her smile says it all.
Everybody rags on me because I've never been romantically involved with anyone. Katherine's little sister, who by the way is eight years old, ragged on me all last Thursday and Friday about possibly dating Katherine's new neighbor, who by the way I've only seen once and totally don't remember his face or finding myself attracted to him. Who knows, maybe he is decent...but I certainly don't remember because we were moving her into the house, and I was hot and sweaty and dehydrated and totally not interested in thinking about dudes.
And you know what, as much as I'd love to experience being linked to someone on a lover's level, I'm not as worried about it as others are. My mother is totally freaked out at the fact that I've never been with anyone and for all she knows, I'm still a virgin. At one point, my parents were convinced that I was a lesbian, and I'm sure they still wouldn't be surprised if I brought home a girl and said, "yeah, so this is my partner and we're in love." I think they're just worried that they might never make it long enough to see their youngest daughter complete with that I'm-so-in-love glow.
I'm actually kind of tired of looking around for a dude, and I'm definitely tired of my friends saying "that guy's cute." Yeah, so? They're all engaged and moving in with their partners now, and I haven't even started. I understand that they worry about my loneliness, but pressuring me to scope out guys just makes me feel like an invalid. And there's really no point in their "we need to find you a dude" excursions, because guys never approach a girl who's in a pack. And frankly, when I'm out with the girls, I'm more interested in hanging out and being in the company of them. I love them, but I don't like when they try to cure my singledom.
At this point, I'm just so used to being by myself, and sure, it's sucky at times, but I can live with it...I've done so thus far. So maybe they're all right: I just don't make an effort. But is it so wrong to believe that you can't force yourself to find love? Is it so wrong to believe that one day you'll just stumble upon the right person while you're at the grocery store, or walking down the street?
I'm so over the skeezy dating and awkward conversation and silence scene; not that I've really done much of it, but more than enough to know that I'm over it. Going on a date is such a farce: you get totally babed out, have bogus conversation about yourself so you can get sized up, and then that's it. In reality, I'm never really babed out that much if ever, and I never really talk about myself that much. I actually have more fun when I go out with someone when my hair's so haggard ass that it's tied up and I'm hardly wearing makeup if any, and I'm wearing some gross ass jeans that need to be washed, and we're having the most absurd, silly conversation in the world...because that's me, and because being a babe isn't. This is why I don't listen to my friends about my looks and my topics of conversation, because putting on that farce only lands me a sleazy time. I'd much rather walk away with the possibility of having at least a cool new friend, as opposed to someone you'll never talk to, and hope to god you never run into again.
If anyone were to ever fall in love with me, they'd fall in love with the haggard me...which is often.
So they can all rag on me...but, I won't change, I'll still believe that laughter is more attractive than some outfit.
And you know what, as much as I'd love to experience being linked to someone on a lover's level, I'm not as worried about it as others are. My mother is totally freaked out at the fact that I've never been with anyone and for all she knows, I'm still a virgin. At one point, my parents were convinced that I was a lesbian, and I'm sure they still wouldn't be surprised if I brought home a girl and said, "yeah, so this is my partner and we're in love." I think they're just worried that they might never make it long enough to see their youngest daughter complete with that I'm-so-in-love glow.
I'm actually kind of tired of looking around for a dude, and I'm definitely tired of my friends saying "that guy's cute." Yeah, so? They're all engaged and moving in with their partners now, and I haven't even started. I understand that they worry about my loneliness, but pressuring me to scope out guys just makes me feel like an invalid. And there's really no point in their "we need to find you a dude" excursions, because guys never approach a girl who's in a pack. And frankly, when I'm out with the girls, I'm more interested in hanging out and being in the company of them. I love them, but I don't like when they try to cure my singledom.
At this point, I'm just so used to being by myself, and sure, it's sucky at times, but I can live with it...I've done so thus far. So maybe they're all right: I just don't make an effort. But is it so wrong to believe that you can't force yourself to find love? Is it so wrong to believe that one day you'll just stumble upon the right person while you're at the grocery store, or walking down the street?
I'm so over the skeezy dating and awkward conversation and silence scene; not that I've really done much of it, but more than enough to know that I'm over it. Going on a date is such a farce: you get totally babed out, have bogus conversation about yourself so you can get sized up, and then that's it. In reality, I'm never really babed out that much if ever, and I never really talk about myself that much. I actually have more fun when I go out with someone when my hair's so haggard ass that it's tied up and I'm hardly wearing makeup if any, and I'm wearing some gross ass jeans that need to be washed, and we're having the most absurd, silly conversation in the world...because that's me, and because being a babe isn't. This is why I don't listen to my friends about my looks and my topics of conversation, because putting on that farce only lands me a sleazy time. I'd much rather walk away with the possibility of having at least a cool new friend, as opposed to someone you'll never talk to, and hope to god you never run into again.
If anyone were to ever fall in love with me, they'd fall in love with the haggard me...which is often.
So they can all rag on me...but, I won't change, I'll still believe that laughter is more attractive than some outfit.
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