the winter of our discontent.

I believe that was from Reality Bites. Anyway, I hate how strangers, particularly homeless guys, can tell that I'm not happy. "You say you're doing alright tonite, but your face is saying otherwise." Touché. When the homeless are telling you to cheer up and feel better, then you know you're fucked up.
Passerbys give me that look that seem to say, "Why'd you even stop to talk with them?" Well, gee, let me see: a.) I'm not as cold hearted as people think I am; b.) I'm too nice for my own good; and c.) they're still people, too.
And you know what, those two guys were right; I'm not happy. I may be thankful for everything that I have, or had, but on a day to day basis, I generally feel so alone, so empty, and so dead on the inside. And lately, I just can't hide that anymore; it's seeping out and infecting my exterior.
Nothing makes sense anymore. I'm so in love with the past. Everything seemed so clear, and so planned out, even though it wasn't.
Is this it? Is this how I'm supposed to continue with my life? Am I missing something? Am I supposed to find God now?
Just tell me how to make it better.